5:17pm Friday 22nd January 2010
By Sarah Cosgrove
GREG Zwirn, LA Fitness' New Barnet deputy manager, came to meet me in a pinstripe suit, without a trainer in sight, something which was strangely reassuring.
We talked about my goals and how I could achieve them and Greg's chilled out professional manner made this whole fit fantasy begin to seem possible.
Having said that Greg used to be a sales executive for a series of gyms in the City (penny drops on the pinstripe suit) and you can tell he was very good at it so maybe that helped.
Still buoyed up with hopeful anticipation of the new, superfit me to come I floated upstairs to the gym – when horror set in.
In front of me there were rows and rows of people on machines, exercising. It was like some sort of punishment camp.
To make matters worse, all the poor souls had to distract them from an eternity of cross training was television. You can see why most people prefer the pub.
The place was still packed though and strangely I could see people smiling. What on earth was going on?
Greg handed me over to LA Coach (that's personal trainer to you and me) Adam Edwards who put me on one of the cross trainers, which is a machine you push down on with your feet like circular steps and also pull backwards and forwards with your hands. This was quite a lot of fun – for about two minutes.
It didn't take Adam long to start upping the ante and pressing the buttons on the machine to make me have to push harder to keep my speed up. After five minutes I was knackered.
So this was induction. It was a good job the staff were so nice.
He showed me around the other machines and then took me into a little room where he did a very bad thing indeed – he told me how much I weigh.
LA Fitness takes your blood pressure and measures your Body Mass Index (BMI) and your body fat and something gruesomely called your skeletal muscle percentage so that it can show where you've improved your health overall by exercising.
Then Adam or one of his colleagues gives you advice about what you should do to achieve your goals based on four key goals: trim, tone, fit and train. So I now have a fitness plan and far too intimate a knowledge of how unhealthy I am.
After all that I have to confess I wimped out, big time, and joined a beginners yoga class, where I strained to reach the stretches easily achieved by at least two pregnant women in the room. The less said about that the better.
LA Fitness is at the cheaper end of the market when it comes to gyms, at £40 a month off peak and £50 if you need to use it evenings and weekends. Beginners also need to pay a one-off Kick Start Fee of £49.50 which includes all the inducting and assessments every 12 weeks, as well as giving you incentives to aim for.
At the minute the gym is offering 15 months for the price of 12.
It also has a supply of personal trainers who charge between £50 and £60 an hour.
They are self employed and so you might get pitched at if you go there. I hadn't been in the building ten minutes before one of their number became very interested in me and asked if I'd like a 25 minute free session.
Luckily Greg rescued me, which was just as well since it's the job of a personal trainer to not take no for an answer.
I was too busy doing my rabbit in the headlights impression to take in his name but trust me, if you want someone to stand over you and order you to exercise until you drop, I reckon this guy would be your man.
LA Fitness New Barnet is at 18 East Barnet Rd, New Barnet. EN4 8RN. Telephone: 0843 170 1018 or email:newbarnet@lafitness.co.uk Opening hours are Mon - Thurs: 6:30am - 10:00pm, Fri: 6.30 - 9pm and Sat and Sun: 8:00am - 8:00pm.
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