Don't shoot the messenger, dear reader (From Times Series)

Don't shoot the messenger, dear reader

9:09am Friday 29th May 2009

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There's a sad story on Sky News about an Arsenal fan in Africa hanging himself when his team lost 3-1 to Manchester United in the Champions League semi-final. Looking back on the football season that finished this weekend, I guess I was lucky that Mrs S didn't have a shotgun to put me out of my misery when Barnet were humiliatingly trounced 5-1 by Chester City last August.

As the legendary Liverpool manager Bill Shankly once knowingly remarked: "Football isn't a matter of life and death ... it's more important than that".

They used to say you were getting old when policemen started to look young. These days it's footballers. "My goodness", said Mrs S, a child bride herself in her time, as she notes a player in the play-off finals at Wembley Stadium last weekend, "he can't be more than 12 years old".

I mention Wembley in passing as I took Mrs S along as her birthday treat to watch Burnley beat Sheffield United. She acknowledged that it was a step up the ladder from last year's wedding anniversary trip to Cleethorpes for a fish and chip supper and to see Barnet get thumped 4-1 by Grimsby Town ... another night, by the way, when I wondered if it was worth while carrying on.

Mind you, it was not all champagne and glory at the new Wembley. It took 10 minutes to drive to Neasden - then another 35 minutes crawling along the road off the North Circular to the car park.

When we got to the car park, green ticket on display, the steward refused us entry despite our protests and I finished up 300 yards the other side of the main entrance in a multi-storey place.

The next stage was to find that there was a power cut and there were no escalators to the third floor. Bring on the World Cup!

Younger son Richard is currently directing episodes of The Bill on ITV. Youngest daughter Kathryn is helping Jamie Oliver with a charity function. Dear old Dad is assailed with: "Are you Richard's/Kathryn's father?".

Rick e-mailed me to say that he had been to see West Ham United play and had met a photographer I haven't seen for nearly 40 years ... who had expressed delight that I was still alive and sent best wishes.

Mrs S, too, is getting a complex. I get constant e-mails from the doctor's surgery reminding me to get my blood pressure checked - it's OK, folks, despite Barnet - and she doesn't get any. Worse still, that David Cameron has sent two messages addressed to me urging me to use my postal vote for the Euro elections in his support - nothing for Mrs S though.

Her only consolation was a letter addressed to Dennis and Pat Signy OBE. Reminds me of the time I got called to the Palace to meet The Queen. "Pat's done more to deserve it", said her mother - and she wasn't joking.

So I'm now dreaming of a summer cruise to Malaga, Venice, Dubrovnik and Split and a welcome break from writing stories on the Barnet FC website. I did a piece with manager Ian Hendon the other day about a player who agreed to re-sign, was sent a contract - and then went off and signed for another club. Ian received a text 24 hours after the story appeared saying that he was going elsewhere. "Signy spin", was the response of one or two disrespectful and disbelieving supporters.

Don't shoot the messenger, chaps. He's only doing his job and passing on what he is told.

Back in the Eighties when I was handling the media for Queens Park Rangers, then in the old First Division, manager Alan Mullery had a copy of The Sun on the passenger seat as he drove into work.

At a set of traffic light he glanced at the back page and saw a big story about Rangers striker Mike Robinson going to Liverpool. He rang me in a fury and, after sitting through an expletive or three, I gathered that the story was incorrect.

I rang my good friend Mick Dennis, the author of the piece, and expressed the manager's indignation in strong terms.

Six months later, with a new manager in place after Alan Mullery's departure, Rangers sold Mike Robinson to Liverpool. The old Currant Bun heralded it as an exclusive - with a cut - out of the original story and the two-fingered message for yours truly: "First with the news six months ago".

As cricket takes centre stage the old messenger will be sitting on the balcony of his cabin sipping Scotch and forgetting all about being Alastair Campbell Mark Two.