Who does Nick Clegg play for? (From Times Series)

Who does Nick Clegg play for?

9:37am Wednesday 23rd September 2009

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Wild horses won't drag from me the exclusive quote on what might have befallen Rio Ferdinand in the Manchester United dressing room on Sunday if Michael Owen had not scored a 95th minute winner against Manchester City.

Sir Alex Ferguson, who paid eloquent tribute without notes to Sir Bobby Robson's influence on his own career at the thanksgiving service in Durham Cathedral on Monday, gave a couple of us a private view of City's third goal given away by the unfortunate Ferdinand and related in graphic fashion how he would have reacted if that had led to defeat.

Comedian Bob "The Cat" Bevan surprisingly got a laugh when he asked Sir Alex if transalation copies of his speech would be available. I complimented the United manager on his oratory and jokingly told him I'd short listed him for a eulogy at my memorial. I hasten to add that no date has yet been arranged!

I have known Sir Alex since his first match in charge at Old Trafford against QPR. We met in the dressing rooms when Rangers manager Jim Smith and I, then the chief executive, arrived.

Sir Alex, by the way, volunteered to send a signed United shirt to help Barnet FC at the annual dinner in November.

The football family - well, 1,000 of us - travelled to Durham to pay last respects to the former England manager who attained icon status through his work at home and abroad.

From the moment I arrived at Kings Cross at 9 a.m. we told our Bobby Robson stories over the decades and talked football. Joe Bernstein, who collaborated with Sir Bobby in his Mail on Sunday columns in recent times, commented: "He would have loved every minute of it".

From the moment current England manager Fabio Capello swept past my group at Kings Cross awaiting the platform number of our train it was a day of seeing stars and mingling with old friends.

The big screen at Kings Cross showed a picture of Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg, a fellow traveller. "Who does he play for?" asked one member of our group who leads a sheltered life on the back pages of the papers.

Delia Smith gave me a hug outside Durham Station. "When are you and Pat coming to Norwich to a game?" she asked. "Probably next season", I replied. "Barnet are fourth in the League 2 table and we could be in your division next May".

A young lady standing alongside as I accepted a lift from Delia and husband Michael asked "Are you famous?" I just smiled at her. There wasn't time to debate the issue.

Hey ho, what with Barnet and the World Cup next summer all talk of our next cruise is on hold.

I stood next to former England manager Sven Goran Eriksson in the buffet queue at the private reception at the Radisson Hotel. He was at Underhill recently with his new Notts County charges.

"Sorry about the late winning goal in added time", I said,smugness personified. "Don't worry", he muttered back. "The food was nice though". Good on you, Sven. I'll tell the chef.

There was quite a lot of League 2 football and li'l ol' Barnet talk as John Motson and I circulated around the rooms. I bumped into award winning Mail on Sunday chief sports writer and Charlton Athletic fanatic Patrick Collins.

I rang him at the end of last season when his side were relegated and offered him counselling. I'd been there with Barnet and had the T-shirt.

"Unbeaten in seven this season", he said. "Me, too", I replied. "Haven't lost since the opening game of the season".

We arranged to meet at The Valley when Charlton host Barnet in the Johnstone's Paint Trophy next month. From Durham Cathedral to Charlton in the JPT -- that's some fall.

I reminded Patrick that Barnet beat Charlton 2-0 in a pre-season friendly at Underhill. "We played eight reserves", he said. OK ... who's counting?

At one stage I came across this familiar female face and said: "Lovely to see you" ... and pecked her on both cheeks. While I thought quickly to establish who she was, it was clear she was having the same predicament.

I got in first. "You don't know who I am", I said. She agreed and asked where I knew her from. "Football", I replied. At that moment Sir Bobby Charlton hove into view. "Tell your wife who I am", I said.

As he started to say, she said: "Of course. You're the one with the wife at the football functions who does all the work", she said. I slunk away. I guess being an adjunct to Mrs S has changed me since the Signys and the Charltons dined together at Old Trafford.

The thanksgiving was a solemn occasion interspersed with humour and anecdotes about Sir Bobby. As I have written previously he dubbed Mrs S 'Doris Day' from the day she accepted the march of time and revealed her natural white hair.

Doris and I will remember and miss the loveable Sir Bobby. All of football does. It was a memorable day - the biggest since we said our farewells to Bobby Moore in Westminster Abbey.