One night five years ago, in the small hours of the morning, Indiraa slipped into the private gym on her farm in Arkley, Barnet, and prepared a rope to hang herself from.

“I just wanted to die,” says the now 55-year-old. “The only thing that stopped me was my husband. I thought if he came in and saw me, I don’t think he’d ever get over it. I’ve known him since he was 14 and I was 17 and all I could think about was all he’s ever done for me, and I guess I panicked.”

Instead, Indian-born Indiraa turned to her husband, who she refers to as Mr B, and the family the pair have created on the farm where they have lived for 12 years – staff, musicians, friends and a whole host of rescue animals – to help her combat the depression she has suffered with since the age of 21.

Part of the healing process has been producing her first album, Never Too Late, which describes her struggle with depression but also touches on moments of happiness, sexual observation, sadness, anger and, most importantly, empowerment.

“Never Too Late was the culmination of my journey through those five years since my suicide attempt,” says Indiraa, “and the depression I’ve suffered with for years.

“My tendencies for suicide were fantasies, amazing things, I was just obsessed with the thought of leaving.”

Putting the album together has definitely helped Indiraa, although she admits that coming off the antidepressants her psychiatrist has her on probably won’t happen in the immediate future.

“Depression has a lot of different side effects – you lose confidence and you believe you look like hell. For seven years, I only wore grey, baggy track pants and a white T-shirt, I wouldn’t go out, I had no mirrors in the house. Now I’m confident, I can do gigs. I can stand in front of a mirror and I don’t feel horrible. But I can’t even move without my antidepressants.

“A year ago, if you’d asked me to talk about my depression, even on pain of death I couldn’t have, I’d rather have poked needles under my fingernails. But, you know what, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ve got nothing to lose in life. I know I’m going to pick myself up and keep on going.”

  • Never Too Late is available now from PB Records.